It's not for the faint of heart.

Welcome to my slightly silly, often odd, and mostly messy life.

Saturday, March 13, 2010

If that's how they want to play it...

My former mother in law made a huge mistake. She has no business being involved in my divorce period. She's paying for the X's divorce lawyer, and she keeps trying to play the go between.

She called on Friday. We sent a totally reasonable offer. He said he didn't care anything about the money (there is a sizable 401K) and that he just wants the ability to write letters to the girls from jail.

I agreed to letters only. I can monitor those and if he's inappropriate I have proof, he only screws himself in the end. Part of my offer is that after his release from prison a guardian ad litem will be appointed and he'll only have monitored visitation.

He objects to this. Even though he said he doesn't care about the money...he objects to me asking for 85% of the 401K in lieu of child support. It's not like he has any expenses. While in jail his parents paid off his car, his credit cards, his medical bills, paid for his legal defense team AND his super high powered divorce lawyers. He has NO bills now, zip.... the girls and I are drowning in debt.

He went to jail for trying to shoot me and I got saddled with all our bills. One more gift from Mr. Wonderful. Asshole. He doesn't care about the kids, he cares about punishing me.

He is under some kind of crazy notion that any court in the country will not only give him unmonitored visitation, but he'll get partial custody. A man who plead guilty to a 3rd degree violent domestic violence felony charge? I don't think so...

So when his mother gets involved and calls me to tell me that I'm selfish, greedy, and that I lied to her about this that and the other. Well I got pissed. She told me that the X won't sign as it's written now and we'll be going to court. I can't afford to go to court. I've been told it will be at least 10K, he doesn't care. His mommy will pay his lawyers (who get 2.5x what my lawyer does so it'll cost them 25K)

Selfish fucking bastard. Crazy, selfish people. So this is how we're going to play it. I told my in-laws that as long as they are paying the lawyers, who's only job it is to take the financial resources away from my kids that we need to survive they won't be seeing the kids. They made their choice. They chose their crazy as hell, selfish son over their own grand kids.

God dammit all to hell I'm mad enough to spit. I've already been told by my lawyer that if this goes to court I'll walk away with just about everything. The courts will give me most, if not all, of the 401K, most likely his income taxes too. Plus I'll be suing for my legal fees and all back child support he's not paying while he is in jail. He'll have monitored visitation for sure, that's a given considering the crime he went to prison for.

It's ridiculous that it's come to this. Costing all of us time and money we don't have, and in the end my kids suffer the most. They lost their daddy. We are so broke I'm trying to decide between getting evicted or letting my car get repoed. If I loose my car I can't get to work. If I loose my house we have no place to live, but inside that car. Either way it sucks ass to be us, and now I have to manage to find 10K to pay to go to court to fight for what my kids should be given out of concern for their welfare by their dead beat maniac of a father.

I'm goin' to court...I'm kickin' ass, and there will be hell to pay when I'm done.

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