It's not for the faint of heart.

Welcome to my slightly silly, often odd, and mostly messy life.

Saturday, May 29, 2010

The end of the beginning....

This is one of my very favorite Churchill quotes:

"This is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning."

My best buddy Ethel is going through a lot right now. Her financial situation is dismal, her marriage is under strain, she's moving to a whole new town, she was laid off. There are so many things she's dealing with, and I feel powerless to help her in any significant way. This quote makes me think about her situation. Even with all the negative things in her life, I know she'll come out okay in the end. I know she's going to struggle...but in the end, this will be a new beginning for her family. A new house. A new job. A chance to change their financial problems around and become fiscally stable. It's a chance to worry less about house repairs and late bills and put that effort into rediscovering all the reasons she and her Mister love each other. I really want the very best for all of them. I want this to be a new beginning.

On another hand this quote speaks to me because I feel like I'm coming to the light at the end of the tunnel in regards to all my personal drama. I'm really happy... in some ways happier than I've ever been before. But not in a giddy sort of way - more in a comfortable, content way. I feel so loved and I am so happy having BLT here with the kids and I. In a way there is this sense of guilt over being so happy when Ethel is struggling so much. She is the person I share all my triumphs and struggles with, and yet she's the one person I don't want to burden with my problems - or feel like I'm rubbing my recent good fortune in her face. I would never want her to feel like that. I love her like family.

It amazes me how life plays out. The twists and turns that bring us to the brink of collapse, and pull us back to stability in a never ending ebb and flow of fortune, both good and bad. How small decisions we make effect not only our lives, but the lives of so many around us. All I can hope is that this is a new beginning for all of us, and that bigger, better, more beautiful things are on the horizon.

1 comment:

  1. Now stop you'll make me cry. Your happiness makes me happy and gives me hope. You are my sister of the soul. It's like I said once to you and you repeated recently to me. "I have enough faith for you" I take it up for you when you can not carry it. You take it up for me when I can not carry it. I maybe be down but I am not out, my mind is already working out solutions and opportunities. I'll struggle a bit with what I feel I'm loosing but I'm strong because you lend me your strength.

    Love you,